I am afraid of feeling grief, afraid of sadness. Profound Effect of Music

I must not be the only one out there that decides to not listen to music with words in it. At least, not as a first choice. I prefer a good instrumental playlist over one with words. Music has such a profound effect on a person. And if you’re not emotionally strong, it can definitely break you.

I remember going through a period of enjoying music in my teens, my 20s, and then my 30s rolled around and when life events began to take place in my late 20s, I would find myself having playlists with songs that would just bring me to a dark place. The more I listened to the music, the worst that I would feel.

Have you ever sought out lyrics to just find a song that would match your mood? I’m pretty sure that we all have.

My earliest memories of music go back to Christmas. I love Christmas music and that is one of the only genres of music that I listen to that have words in it. I love the music of the Roman Catholic Church, especially Gregorian Chant.

Thinking back, to where it is that music began to have a hold on me, my earliest memory, would be my mother and I, each grabbing a brush and she would put Barbra Streisand albums on. My mother loved Barbara. She would be Barbra and I would be whoever was singing duet with Barbra Streisand. We would look at each other and dance around the kitchen table, laughing, giggling, music had a profound affect.

My dad is a Moody Blues guy. As we would head up to go camping in the White Mountains, every single summer, on the drive up there, Dad would always be playing a Moody blues cassette. I memorized every single one of those songs. Nights in White satin, is one that I love. I don’t know why I loved it at the time and I still don’t know why I do today.

As a child, at night, my bed was next to the window and I used to open the window on a beautiful summers night and I always remember hearing the trees, the way that the leaves would sound in the trees, this is still, today one of my favorite sounds. I would Sing to the trees, I would sing to the night, very softly, and it would never be a song that I had ever heard, it would just be lyrics that would be coming from my heart. I don’t recollect many of them, besides me telling the moon how beautiful that I thought it was and how grateful I was that the stars lit up the sky at night so I could see the trees, see the leaves that would be swaying their nightly lullaby.

In my teen years, I was very much into the pop rock scene. In my late teens into my 20s I went back to loving all of the 70s music that I was brought up on and still yet, it would invoke so much emotion, so much to the point that I almost began to feel beside myself – becoming emotional by the memories that were being brought back – from the situations in life.

Music, is so beautiful and amazing but it can also have a very profound and depressive state. And if you let yourself get into that kind of a mode, you are setting yourself up for feeling the way that you are feeling, that’s what it really comes down to in the end.

In my 30s and in my early 40s, where I am now, I have come to love instrumental music. There are times that I will still listen to some 70s music but there is such peace and beauty in instrumental music. Perhaps it’s because that emotional state is not there and I’ve come to realize that what I thought was an avoidance problem, was a smart decision to not be wrapped up in any kind of entity that will cause an emotional downfall. None of us need that. And such is the power of music.

So, if you find yourself, listening to music that is bringing you to places where you have already walked away from, make that decision, to either turn it off and find something different that is going to soothe your soul or you can decide to stay in the state of depression, in the state of constantly going back to those issues in your life that you left behind.

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